Frustration
by AdmHawthorne
Summary: Jane is frustrated with her life. One Shot. M for language.


Jane slammed her fist against the wall of her apartment as she yelled out her internal dialogue of frustration and anger.

"Damn it!" Slam. "I fucking _hate_ this shit." Slam. "Why can't I just be normal?" Slam.

"I just want to have," slam, "one thing," slam, "in my fucking life," slam, "to be _**normal**_." Slam.

As the anger subsided, her energy drained and the tears came. With one final slam against her living room wall, she let out one shuddering scream of frustration as she turned and slid down the wall to, once again, cry out her vexation.

"I just want to be normal. I'm so tired of nothing going right in my life." The sobs shuddered through her body. Knees pulled to her chest, head down, hands locked behind her head, the normally composed and strong detective allowed the tears to flow. "Why do I have to be like this? I just… why _her_?" The last came out as a hoarse whisper across her lips. "Why Maura?"

"Why me for what, Jane?" The doctor's voice echoed in the quiet of the apartment.

Jane's head shot up. "Maura, what are you doing here? I thought you had a date." The dark haired brunette wiped at her face, trying to pull herself back together.

"I did, but I ended it early. Your reaction to the news that I was going on a second date with James had me distracted for the entire date." Face unreadable, the doctor removed her coat, slipped out of her heels, and walked over to where Jane sat in the floor watching her.

"I'm sorry. I acted like an ass," Jane couldn't stop the sniffles, "that was uncalled for. He's a nice guy. I don't know what came over me. Maybe you can reschedule?" She took the tissue Maura offered her.

"No, I don't think so." Carefully, Maura sat down in the floor next to her friend, to Jane's left. "Let me see your hand."

"It's fine." Jane shook her head in the negative as she tried to keep her hand away from the doctor's inspection. "You didn't answer my question. What are you doing _here_?" She finally gave in at Maura's insistence and let her left hand be taken.

"I came to see you." Hazel eyes inspected the damage to the hand. "I was worried about you, and, it would appear, with good reason. Jane, why would you punch a wall? Your hand is bruised, but I don't think anything is broken, though an x-ray is wise. I don't understand why you do such damage to yourself."

"I was… frustrated. I just… look, Maura, I appreciate your concern, but you shouldn't have cut your date short for me. I'll be okay. I guess I'm just PMSing or something." Jane shrugged.

"I think it's more than that, and I think you do, too." Maura gave a heavy sigh. "Jane, you know it's difficult to keep secrets away from me. I'm highly trained in reading facial muscles and body language."

"So… what? You know that I hate Crowe? _That_ is no secret." The detective tried to pull her hand away, but the honey blonde refused to let it go.

"Stop deflecting." Maura was annoyed and there were hints of fatigue in her voice and around her eyes. "We need to talk about this."

"No. We do not need to talk about anything. You need to give me my hand back." The glare was settling on Jane's face. It was the first warning signs that another storm was brewing. "Then you can leave."

"You don't scare me, Jane. You never have, and I'm not about to allow you to start." Turning to face the lanky woman next to her, the doctor placed her free hand on Jane's face, forcing them to look at each other. "You know I can't lie, Jane. Why don't you just ask me?"

"If you know the question, why don't you just tell me?" The detective's voice was tired, and it cracked with emotion and unshed tears.

"You need to take this step when you're ready. I'm not going to force you. I can't." With a gentleness she only showed to her best friend, Maura ran her hand from Jane's cheek to the wild mane of hair to try to pull it away from the sharp, angular features she'd come to truly adore. "I need to know that I didn't force you to do something that you didn't really want to do or weren't ready for."

"Yoga." Jane closed her eyes, her breath slowing down to a normal rate with the petting from her friend. "Marathons. Salads."

"You do those things because you want to."

"I do those things because you asked me, and I have a hard time telling you no."

"My point."

Dark brown eyes opened to hazel eyes that gleamed with such deep affection that, for a tiny moment, Jane's breath caught. "Maura, I… will you… can we," she grunted at her own awkwardness. "Why aren't we dating?" The shock that she had actually asked the question shown clearly on her face.

"Because you've never asked me." Maura gave a small, encouraging smile.

"Well, I'm asking you now. I hate seeing you date all those _other_ people. It pisses me off, and," she looked down at her quickly bruising hand, "I don't think my wall or my hand can handle you going on another date that isn't with me. Go out with me, Maura. Give me a chance. I know I'm not from money, and I…"

She was cut off by Maura's lips on her own. "Yes, Jane."

"Yes?" Tears again. This time, of relief instead of the normal anger or frustration she generally felt regarding her relationship with the doctor.

"Yes. I've been waiting for you to ask me for quite a while now." Maura brought Jane's bruised knuckles to her lips to place a soft kiss there. "Can I take care of you now?"

"Okay." Standing on shaky legs, still dazed at what had just happened, Jane followed Maura into the bathroom.

"Next time," Maura began.

"There won't be a next. Next time, you'll be with me and not with some person who doesn't appreciate you like they should." Again, shock at what she had just said filled Jane's face.

Maura simply smiled in return and began to attend to Jane's hand.


End file.
